slutdust:

I bought my friend an elephant for their room.

They said “Thank you.”

I said “Don’t mention it.”

agentbering:

jessepumpkin:

i can only handle so much socializing until i get tired and start getting irritated towards everyone and want to go home and sleep or lock myself in my room and go on the computer

idcau:

if you stare at me in public my self esteem will drop 100%

Eat chocolate spread and watch films with me on the sofa.

What pisses me off most about HM Revenue and Customs is that if I pay too little tax they’ll track me down and I’ll be in trouble, but if I pay too much they couldn’t care less and make it really difficult for me to claim it back.

distressed • overjoyed